Monday, 17 September, 2001

Last Tuesday morning, terrorists attacked the United States of America.  They were able to hijack four commercial airplanes and crashed two of them into the World Trade Center’s twin towers in New York City, one of them into the Pentagon in Washington, D.C. and another missed its mark and crashed in Pennsylvania.  All passengers, crews, and hijackers lost their lives as well as thousands of individuals working in and around the buildings.  The story is horrific and dominated the news all week long and again into this week.  I am not going to give a lot of details here because the information will always be available, I just want to say that the terrorists devastated a nation but have succeeded in drawing Americans closer together. 

I am grateful that my girls are not older so that I don’t have to try and explain what has happened and why.  I am certain, however, that there will be more opportunities where I will have to explain such evil to them as they grow older.

Alicia is now getting over her cold.  Her runny nose was gone by Wednesday or Thursday, but she has had a cough that is hanging on.  Unfortunately, it seems as though Amy is getting sick again.  She hasn’t been around anyone who appears to be sick, so I don’t know where she caught this one from.  She is sleeping right now and has been asleep for 2 ½ hours already.  I just hope that whatever she has, she will not pass it along to Alicia again.  I am tired of having sick children.

We went out to Firestone on Friday to look at our new house.  They just finished painting it and all of the cabinets and finish work materials are sitting in the garage waiting to be installed.  We had thought that perhaps we ought to lock into an interest rate on Friday with all of the turmoil that is happening, but both Chris and I felt that we should wait.  It is a good thing, though we don’t wish to benefit through tragedy, but another cut in the interest rate was announced this morning.  We’ll wait and see.  At least I don’t see the rates going up anytime soon which is fortunate for us.  We are hoping to get a rate lower than 7% this time.

We are excited by the thought of being in our new home in about a month.  I guess Amy is getting used to us driving around looking at houses in this area and to having us talk about our house; now when we are driving around she asks, “New house?”  I think she understands in a small way that this apartment is not permanent and that we will be moving again soon.  I hope so.  It should be the last major change for awhile–except for potty training....

Wednesday, 12 September, 2001

Amy has been quite out of sorts lately.  I think that it is her way to deal with all of the changes about her.  She has taken to hitting Alicia knowing, I think, that it will get a strong reaction from me.  I tried putting her in her room for a couple of minutes when she hit Alicia, where she would then cry until I let her out.  Last week, she pushed a small button on the door which locked the door so that when I went to let her out, I couldn’t.  I tried to get Amy to turn the door knob, but she is not usually able to.  Finally I decided to get a screwdriver and taken the door knob off of the door.  Fortunately, what I thought was a screw actually popped the lock.  Thank heaven!  As I brought her out of her room, grateful that I was able to unlock the door but still frustrated that she wasn’t being very kind, I knelt down in front of her so that I could talk to her eye-to-eye.  As I knelt down, she also proceeded to kneel down–because this is what we do when we pray-and folded her arms across her little chest.  I looked at her and said, “Yes, this is definitely a moment to say a prayer.”  I then said, “Heavenly Father, please help Amy to be more obedient and help Mommy to be more patient....”  I couldn’t be upset with her any more and wrapped my arms around her.

Another morning at the dinner table, she was being rather grumpy again.  Chris was sitting beside her and her face was so pouty that I grabbed the camera to take a picture.  I turned the camera on, and as soon as Amy heard the camera warming up, she lost the pouty face, turned toward the camera smiling and said, “Cheese!!!”  What a nut.

Alicia had her two-month well child check up on Monday the 10th.  We went to the Longmont Clinic just down the street and our appointment was with Dr. Benson.  I basically just picked a doctor hoping that he would be as wonderful as Dr. Berry.  No such luck, though he was nice enough.  There was just something missing.  Anyway, Alicia has been sick since Friday and was pretty stuffed up so I had him check her for that too.  There’s not much you can do with a baby this small–just give them Tylenol and hope they feel better.   She now weighs 12 pounds 7 ounces which means she has gained half her body weight since birth.  She is also 23 ½ inches tall.  She has definitely filled out a lot from the skinny little bit of a thing that she was when she was born.

Tuesday, 4 September, 2001

Last Thursday, August 30, Chris met with the builders for a pre-sheetrock meeting on our home.  They want to make sure that all of the electrical outlets, ceiling lights, cable and telephone jacks are in the right place before they put the sheetrock up.  They have given a tentative closing date of October 16th give or take a little.  We are so excited that everything is moving so quickly.

Alicia is growing quickly.  She was so tiny for a few weeks, but is lengthening out quite a lot.  I am sure that she is gaining weight as well, but the length is mostly noticeable.  She has a doctors appointment next Monday the 10th so we will be able to find out her weight and height then.  She is losing hair on the sides of her head and will no doubt have rubbed it all off within a couple of weeks.  It has begun to grow in more on the top but I am sure that it will take longer to be replenished on the sides.  She is beginning to notice toys if I hang them in her line of sight and will try to bat them with her hands.  I sat her in front of the tv and she watched it for at least 20 minutes.  She was getting me up once during the night, usually around 3ish, and then sleeping until 6ish.  They say that once they get to be about 11 pounds, they do begin to sleep longer and she has begun to lengthen out her sleeping time at night.   Amy started to sleep longer at 6 weeks, but she was also bigger.  Alicia now goes to sleep around 9 pm, sleeps until 4 am and then again until 9ish.  She is too much asleep at 10 pm to eat again though I think she would sleep until 5 am which would be nicer for me.  From about 3:00 pm on she is eating every two to two and a half hours, I guess she is trying to store up food for the long night of not eating.

We purchased a twin bed for Amy last Saturday and followed that purchase with sheets and a comforter this previous Saturday to help her feel that her new bed was special just for her.  She has been sleeping in it very well for almost a week now.  We have a railing that fits between the mattress and the box springs so that she won’t fall out of the bed, though I did find her on the floor a couple of nights ago as she tried to crawl out the end of the bed.  She also fell out of bed a couple of weeks ago when we were staying in SLC at the Wyndham hotel on our way to Longmont.  Chris and I were quickly awake and out of bed.  She cried a bit and promptly went back to sleep.  A positive trait that Amy has is that it only seems to take her a couple of days to adjust to new changes.

She has been going to nursery in our new ward, but she doesn’t seem to like it as much as our old ward.  Probably because it is somewhat unfamiliar and partly because the leaders are new and need to work harder at making sure the kids feel comfortable.  Hopefully they will learn.

I have started to exercise again and hope to make it a regular habit.  There is a fitness center with a treadmill and weight machines that I like to use in the morning.  Alicia’s schedule usually allows me to go about 6 am and be back in time to help Chris get out the door for work.  It feels great to be exercising again.  I still have a lot of weight to lose and muscles to tighten up, and I am committed to being leaner again.

It is a pet peeve of mine when people in Utah say you move out into the mission field when you move away from Utah.  (I had never heard that way of thinking until I moved to Utah).  Somehow it seems to elevate Utahns above the need to be missionaries and gives the impression that they think everyone in Utah is LDS, but it is nice to have the opportunity to meet people who are just as good-hearted and trying to live exemplary lives in their own faith.

Chris is doing well at work.  He enjoys the people on his team.  Most of them work from home and Chris hopes that once we get situated in our new house that he will be able to transition back into working from home–at least a couple of days a week.  I would like that too and think it would be especially nice on days when the weather isn’t so great.

Alicia smiles at me all of the time-genuine smiles AT me, and she also makes some cute cooing noises.  She is learning to hold her head up and gaining more strength.  Where Amy would never put any pressure on her legs, Alicia will push against anything that gives a little resistance.  I just hope that she isn’t walking at 9 months.  She is sleeping in her bouncy chair right now in front of the tv.  We have made a much greater effort to keep her a part of the noise even when she is sleeping.  Amy is such a light sleeper and that is our fault.  We tried to be so quiet when she was tiny and now Alicia wakes her up instead of vice versa.

Awhile ago I started saying to Amy “hup, two, three, four.  March march march march” when I wanted her to get moving somewhere.  A couple of days ago, I asked her to come in to her bedroom to get her pajamas on.  I wasn’t paying too much attention when I suddenly here this tiny little voice saying “march march march march” and she was marching her way into the bedroom.  She is so cute.  We bought her some new tennis shoes for the fall and she will stand on one side of the room and wait for me to say, “one two three go” and then go running into the kitchen as fast as she can.  She thinks that it is a pretty fun game to play.

Dallin and Donna closed on their new home last week and moved into it over the weekend.  Yesterday was the Labor Day holiday so they finished up moving yesterday.  They are thrilled to be in their new home and to have a home all to themselves.  They have been living in the basement of Donna’s parents home since January.  I am sure that it has been a blessing to have a place to stay, but it has also been a challenge to be dependent on someone else’s generosity–even if it is family.  I am excited for them and wish that we could have been closer to help.  They purchased a three bedroom townhome–similar to our last house–close to Thanksgiving Point and Lehi.  It will now only be a ten minute drive to work for Dallin instead of at least an hour.  They are planning to come and visit us in November over Thanksgiving, and I am so excited to have them come.  We will have been in our new house at least one month by then.

Saturday, 25 August, 2001

We met Stan and Pam Braun up in Loveland around 11 am to go to the outlet mall there.  Pam and I headed for the Carter’s store first of all and spent most of our time there.  I purchased some shirts for Alicia and new jammies for Amy plus a new classier diaper bag.  We decided to go for lunch after that, though it took awhile since I had to nurse Alicia and Pam then went to nurse Evan.  After lunch, Chris wanted to go up to Fort Collins to look at some mattress stores and amazingly enough we ran in to Stan and Pam at a children’s store right next to the mattress store.  Unfortunately Amy had a blow out diaper (she has had diarrhea since we got here) and Chris had to run to Walmart to get new diapers.  Chris wanted to get a bed for Amy at the mattress store and made arrangements with Stan to pick it up the next day in his truck.  It was a big imposition I am sure, but Stan was kind enough to help us out.

We are enjoying the company of some fellow BYU transplants.  One couple has lived here for over a year now-Ken and Carli Siders-and are expecting a baby next month.  The other two couples have moved here recently and both of them are expecting as well–January and March so they have a way to go.  I am just grateful that I am no longer pregnant.  It is not my favorite thing in the world.  Chris also has a lot of friends whom he works with.  We have done a few things with Stan and Pam and their son Evan.  They are not LDS but are super nice people.

We arranged to have dinner with Ken and Carli at our house on Saturday evening.  It was just after the BYU football game which was aired on ESPN.  BYU tromped Tulane so well that ESPN stopped airing the game in the 4th quarter and showed Little League baseball playoffs.  We decided to have a BBQ and just before we got started Mark DeBry called to ask if they could join us for a BBQ along with the other BYU couple--Shane and Rochelle Allred.

Friday, 24 August, 2001

Kyle called Chris today to announce that Becky had her baby  around 11:30 am.  She went into the hospital around midnight and Andrew Michael arrived about 12 hours later.  He was 20 and 3/4 inches in length and weighed 7 pounds 8 ounces–2 ounces less than Alicia–and he was at least 2 1/2 weeks early.  His due date was the 9th of September.  Fortunately for Becky that she didn’t go full term; Andrew would have been a big baby.  Both Becky and baby were doing well though Andrew has had a challenge learning to nurse.  He was given a bottle in the hospital and liked that too much.  Becky wanted to prove to herself that she could have her baby without an epidural and only had painkillers throughout the labor.  More power to her!!  I guess he has his nights and days mixed up and sleeps all day long and stays up at night.  I am so grateful that both of our girls are good sleepers.

I noticed that I had a pretty painful lump on my breast and realized that I had a clogged milk ducts last Monday.  I read in some of my books that I needed to keep nursing Alicia on it and massaging the lump away.  It was extremely painful and hurt for me to just hold my arm normally against my side.  I continued to massage the lump, which became quite large, for the next few days, though it didn’t seem as though it was helping just hurting.  Finally the pain has started to subside today.  I am grateful that it didn’t become infected and turn in to mastitis–an infection of the milk ducts-which requires antibiotics.

Monday, 19 August, 2001

We went to church on Sunday at 11 am.  The church is just a short drive down the street right now, but once we move, it will likely take about 25 minutes just to get to church.  The ward has grown even more since we attended in April and seems to have a lot more young people.  I think that we will enjoy it.  After church and naps, we drove to Estes Park, about 45 minutes away.  It is kind of like Park City or Waterton Park in Alberta.  We didn’t stay too long since Alicia was crabby and it was getting close to Amy’s bed time.  The drive was nice though through the mountains.

Saturday, 18 August, 2001

 It is amazing that almost 6 weeks have passed since Alicia’s birth; she is a joy to have in our home.  That’s definitely appreciated right now since Amy has been catapulted into so many changes and is showing a little wear–as we all are.  She is well into the “terrible twos” and some days I am so exasperated with her.  I keep telling myself that this behavior is normal for someone her age, but it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with and to be patient with.  Ah, patience.  I pray for more of it everyday especially as I look down at the crayon markings all over the front of Chris’ hard drive.

Amy calls me Jo but also calls me mommy every once in awhile and points to me when Chris asks her who mommy is.  She has gotten into the habit of waking up early so we are letting her cry herself back to sleep.  This morning was no different and after her first initial cries she started into “Jo!  Jo! Joooooooooo! Joooooooo!” with all of the necessary inflections.  She did stop crying, and I thought she had gone back to sleep, but when I got up to go to the bathroom, she was quick to let me know she was still awake.  Amy likes to be independent; we live on the third floor and she has to walk up and down the stairs all by herself.  She is quite good at it, but I still worry that she’ll fall.  We tell her that she has to hold our hands in parking lots because of the cars but she refuses unless she actually sees one coming toward her.

Friday, 17 August, 2001

We are now living in Longmont, Colorado in a small 2 bedroom apartment waiting for our new home to be built.  I think we are pretty much unpacked and have things put where they will stay for the next couple of months. Our apartment is small and reminds me of the places I used to live in as a student.  We put most of our things into storage and have stacked boxes along the dining room wall and in Amy’s room.  It isn’t all that pretty and we haven’t done much decorating, but it will be comfortable enough for the next couple of months.   It has been pretty much a shock to both Chris and myself to downsize into this apartment.  There is very little storage space and it is about 25 years old.  We console ourselves by remembering that it is only for a short time.

We drove out to look at our house, or what we hoped would be our house, the same day we got here.  We were so depressed by our living situation that we needed something to boost our spirits.  We were so surprised as we drove onto Dresden St. and saw that our house was completely framed and ready for windows where no other houses stood around us.  I drove out again a week later while the girls were sleeping in the car (I was trying to keep Amy asleep for as long as possible) and was greatly surprised again.  Some of the neighboring homes were beginning to be framed, but ours now had windows, siding and the shingles are stacked on the roof ready to be added.

Melinda DeBry, the wife of one of Chris’ friends and classmates from BYU, came over in the morning and invited us to dinner.  It was so thoughtful of them.  We were all so tired, and Amy was pretty out of sorts that we didn’t stay too long.  One of Chris’ coworkers, Stan Braun, called to invite us to dinner on Friday as well, but we planned instead to meet on Saturday evening at Woody’s Pizza in Longmont.  Again, it was thoughtful to help us make the transition here and feel like we weren’t on our own.

Thursday, 16 August, 2001

Today is our 4th anniversary.  Who could have imagined the changes that would come in to our lives in just four short years.  Perhaps in a couple of weeks when things settle down some, we will be able to celebrate.  Tonight we will eat out “just the four of us.”

Thursday, August 16, 2001

The day finally arrived that I have been dreading and trying not to think of for the past couple of months.  Sadly, the packers forgot that they were supposed to come that morning and after many phone calls throughout the morning, the finally showed up around 1 pm.  We still weren’t prepared, but then we didn’t really know what we needed to do in advance.  If we ever have to do it again, we will make sure that all of our bags are packed that we want to keep with us, we’ll empty out the fridge of all of its dishes and empty the dishwasher.

Susan kindly watched Amy for us on both Monday and Tuesday.  It would have been crazy trying to keep her out of the way of the movers all day long.  The King kids were happy to have her around, though I am not quite sure they realized that Amy would be leaving for good.

The packers were at our house until about 5:30 or 6 and said that the movers would be to our house the next morning at least by 10 am.  Fortunately, we were up early because the movers arrived around 8:30 am.  They arrive with a sem-truck and began to empty the house of all of its boxes out into the parking lot.  Once there, the driver began to sort through what was going to storage and what we would keep at the apartment and then arranged it in the truck so that it would fit well.  That took them quite some time and as they finished emptying a room, we would begin to clean it.  Everything was taken care of on schedule and our taxi to Salt Lake arrived at 4 pm.  I had just finished feeding Alicia, and Susan and kids had just arrived with Amy.  Susan and I hugged for a minute or so and I cried at the thought of leaving her and all of our family.  I hugged her kids and Jenna and Karra both started to cry also.  (Susan says that when Jenna realized that she wouldn’t be able to come over to go swimming any more, that she cried all over again). 

The driver got all of our stuff packed into the van which was no small feat.  We had two strollers, two car seats, a diaper bag and a bunch of suitcases.  We waved a sad farewell to Kings, to our wonderful house, and to Provo and were off.  I didn’t cry much, but it sure was hard to see it all go.

Because Brad and Dallin needed Chris’ help one last time, the driver dropped Chris off at a gas station in Draper where Dallin then picked him up, and I continued on to the Wyndham Hotel in downtown Salt Lake with the girls.  I am certainly glad that I don’t have to travel with them alone–it was quite a handful.  We got settled into the hotel hoping the Chris and Brad would be back around 7:30 or 8 pm.  We waited and waited and waited and finally they came about 9:30.  Amy and I hadn’t eaten since lunch except for crackers and whatever snacks I had packed and were both quite hungry.  I had a pounding headache that wouldn’t stop and was quite crabby.  We had originally planned to go out to dinner but since Brad and Chris were so late getting there, they picked up pizza instead.  Brad didn’t stay too long since it was late and we were all wiped out.  It’s too bad that our last night together had to be so crazy.

Our flight to Denver was around 10 am on Wednesday morning which gave us plenty of time to get ready and eat.  Since IBM was paying for our meals, we had a lovely breakfast in the hotel restaurant, though Amy certainly wasn’t on her best behavior.   Our drive to the airport was an adventure in and of itself as our driver threw up in van on our way.  Lovely.  We made it to the airport with moments to spare, checked our luggage and car seats and headed for our gate.  When we finally got onto the plane (we were flying Delta and they don’t pre-board young families any longer) we were in three seats together in the middle aisle of the plane.  We had to check Alicia’s car seat because the plane was so full.  The one-hour flight was mostly uneventful and Amy was mostly good.  She did have a few moments during the flight of orneriness, but we are getting used to that.  We arrived in Denver only to find that the airlines had broken the handle on Alicia’s car seat.  We had to make a baggage claim, pick up our luggage and be to our shuttle in a short amount of time and just barely made it.  Amy fell asleep as Chris was waiting for the luggage and slept on our laps in the shuttle bus all the way to Boulder.  We had to transfer to another van at that point that then took us to Longmont.  Chris had made reservations for us at the Super 8 for two nights.  It was your run-of-the-mill motel...nothing fancy.  But, it was a place to sleep.

We decided to drive out to Brighton on Wednesday evening to the Super Walmart there.  We purchased a microwave since our apartment did not have one.  We also bought food and had to stock up on all of the things we just barely gave away in Utah–ketchup, mustard, mayonaisse, etc.–things we weren’t able to bring with us.

I drove Chris to work on Thursday morning so that I could have the car for the day.  (We sent the blue Honda out a week early so that we would have some kind of transportation once we got here.  It was delivered to Sider’s home and they were kind enough to sign for it).  I went back to the hotel with the girls but it wasn’t a whole lot of fun.  I got Amy to sleep and when I started to move around, she woke right back up.

Around noon, I decided to take the girls over to our apartment for lunch.  We had signed the lease the day before, but since we didn’t have any beds or blankets we had to stay at the hotel.  We did have some food at the apartment and, of course, the microwave.  Unfortunately, we had no silverware and until I remembered that Chris had a small pocketknife on his key chain, I wasn’t quite sure how I would be able to slice cheese.  I tried to get Amy to sleep, but no luck.  Finally, I loaded the girls into the car and drove around for the next while until it was time to pick up Chris.  I went on some of the back roads around here to get to know the area better.  It is quite beautiful this time of the year.

Our furniture arrived bright and early at the apartment on Friday the 17th of August.  Chris was able to take the day off from work to help the movers and help me get things unpacked.  I never would have been able to do it with Amy on my own.  I took Chris over to the apartment about 8:00 am and the driver arrived shortly after that.  I went back to the hotel with the girls until it was time to checkout so that I could keep them out of the way.  After checking out, I drove around again so that Amy would sleep and then found a shady place to stop where she continued to sleep.  I fed Alicia and read a book. 

By the time we got back to the apartment, the movers was just finishing unloading the truck.  Our apartment is on the third floor, so I am sure that it wasn’t a lot of fun.  We had a lot of things that went to storage and decided to send a few more things when it was realized that it would be difficult to get them into the apartment, ie., our couch and entertainment center.  We have our loveseat and my rocking chair and the tv is on a smaller cupboard that I keep Amy away from so that she won’t push the tv off.

We have a small deck off of the living room that Amy likes to spend time on.  It is “outside” to her.  Unfortunately, the rails are spaced just far enough apart that she could slip through them.  I had to put a large box across part of the fenced area and the BBQ sits on the other half of the deck.

Sunday, 12 August, 2001

Mom and Dad returned to Utah on July 28–this time to help me out and for Alicia’s baby blessing.  Normally we wouldn’t bless her quite so soon, but since all of our family is here we wanted to take advantage of that. Mom stayed with us from July 31st to August 3rd and was a real help.  Dad stayed up in Salt Lake with Brad and continued to help Brad and Dallin out at their new practice.  It was certainly a sacrifice for them to come again, and I certainly appreciated it.  Amy did as well.  She got to spend a lot of one on one time with her grandma.  That freed me up to get the rest I needed and to spend time taking care of Alicia.  In the evenings she would send Chris and I off together for dinner or just time away and watch both the girls for us.  We had the cell phone if she needed us, but we knew that it would be the last time we would be out alone in a long time, so we took advantage of her generosity.  We went shopping at a couple of stores during the week, mostly in the morning when I had the most energy.  Having Mom there was also great for Chris because Mom diverted Amy’s attention away from him as he was back to work.  Amy had such a hard time understanding that he was not available to her, especially since he had the two weeks off after Alicia’s birth and spent almost all of that time caring for Amy.

Just a side note about your dad.  There is something about having a baby that brings out the best in him and makes me love him even more.  He is so kind and good and patient, and I am amazed at the wonderful man and father that he is.  As I just wrote, he spent most of his two weeks off with Amy–when I was in the hospital and then when I came home.  I was not able to lift Amy and he did all of it–even to change dirty diapers.  I hope that someday both of my girls will find a man to marry who is as good Christopher, who will treat you as a queen, and love the children that you bring into your family.

Soon after Mom left on Friday, Larry Kline flew in.  He arrived on Sunday morning for Alicia’s baby blessing and stayed until Monday morning.  He is not an active member of the church, and we know that these kinds of functions are not his favorite thing to do, but we sure do appreciate that he makes the effort for us.  Plus, he thinks the world of his granddaughters and shows your pictures off wherever he travels.

He took us out to breakfast on Monday morning before he left at IHOP (International House of Pancakes).  While there, Grandma Ball arrived with a friend from Washington, Sara, who is now married and living in Orem (she and Kevin were an “item” for a while).  Grandpa Kline had them join us for breakfast and even paid for theirs.

We blessed Alicia on August 5.  All but Shane and Mitch were there from both sides of our families.  It was a little tense for awhile as the freeway was at a standstill and Brad, Mom, and Dad were trying to get to Provo.  They arrived late, but we just moved the blessing from before the sacrament to after the sacrament.  It was a beautiful blessing and Alicia was darling.  She wore the same dress that Amy was blessed in.  If memory serves, they both looked like angels in it.

After the blessing and church, we all got together at the clubhouse for a family dinner.  I had to feed Alicia so I was a little late getting there but it was great for family to mingle together.  The kids loved playing out on the toys and only wished that they could go swimming.  Everyone helped out with the food and we had plenty.  We just had sandwiches with cold meats, raw veggies, fruit, jello salad, and pasta salad.  For dessert we had ice cream and brownies.  It was nice to be together.

I asked Amy what her sister’s name was and she answered by saying “Lesha”.  It was so cute.  She still calls her that though sometimes it comes out sounding like “Sasha”.

Larry Ball had a flight back to Washington that same evening so he and Grandma Ball had to leave about 7ish.  She came back later that night, but Chris and his dad were out for a walk.  Not to worry, since she was with us the whole next week.  (Having family was great but it got to be too much after awhile, especially as we were getting ready to move).

It was frustrating for me when Amy came down with a cold on Wednesday.  She just wouldn’t keep away from Alicia and as much as we all tried to wash her hands, Alicia got a snuffy nose on Thursday.  I give Amy “purple stuff” so that her nose doesn’t bother her too much, but there’s nothing that they recommend giving to babies who are so small.  Alicia just had to suffer, consequently her mommy felt awful.  Chris and Kevin gave Alicia a blessing on the 9th and she was better within a day.  How grateful I am for the priesthood.

We wanted to have a BBQ with family and some of our friends that we would miss by moving away.  Unfortunately, not many people came, though family was really supportive.  We had a BBQ over at the clubhouse and had people bring food to share.  For all of those who did come, there was plenty to eat and lots of fun.

Thursday, 9 August, 2001

It is amazing that my little girl is already one month old.  Time has flown by this past month, but before I relate the present, I still have to get caught up on the past month!

We had visitors the first night–Kevin and Candace, Becky and Kyle, and Lori and her roommate Elena.  They were all very impressed by our beautiful little girl and are looking forward to the arrival of their sons.  Becky is due about Sept. 9 though she has been to the hospital twice already to try and stop contractions that would bring their little Andrew Michael too early.  Kevin and Candace are due on November 26 and just found out on August 3 that they too are having a boy.

Mom and Dad were kind enough to come and stay at our house Monday night so that Chris could spend the night at the hospital with me and his newest daughter.  We kept trying to figure out what to name our daughter.  Our choices were Rachel McKenna and Alicia Michelle.  I tried calling her both names at different times to see if either one fit and we finally decided on Alicia Michelle.  She is sooooo tiny and everyone who sees her comments on her size.  It is somewhat scary to hold such a tiny little bundle.  I am always afraid that I will drop her.

Mom and Dad stopped to visit on Tuesday morning, bringing Amy to the hospital as well, before heading back up to Salt Lake to help Brad and Dallin more on their practice.  They have all been working long hours to get everything ready for their opening this month, but it seems as though there is always something more to do.  Anyway, they didn’t stay at the hospital too long, but long enough for Dad to be introduced to his newest granddaughter.  Chris must have passed them on the way to the hospital as he went home to get Amy for the day.  Tuesday was mostly a day of resting (in between walking and stretching) for me and a day of coming back and forth to the hospital for Chris in between Amy’s naps.  Amy doesn’t seem to mind her little sister too much, but I don’t think she realizes that Mommy is bringing this little person home to stay.

 Chris’ sister, Lori, had volunteered to stay at the house after Amy went to bed on Tuesday so that Chris could come back to the hospital to spend some time with me, but she never showed up and finally called to say that she wasn’t coming.  Becky and Kyle were kind enough to come over to the house and did so the next couple of nights.  It was thoughtful of Becky and Kyle to help us out.

Mom and Dad left for home on Wednesday the 11th because Dad had an appointment with his internist on the 12th.  They had waited a long time to get into see the doctor and didn’t want to miss the opportunity to see him.

It has been a blessing for Chris to be working at IBM during this birth.  Because we had a c-section, they gave him two weeks off–days which are separate from his regular vacation days.  He was able to spend a lot of time with Amy which she really needed.  Especially since I wasn’t able to lift her and am only now just starting to (August 11th).

Susan and her kids came to the hospital on Wednesday.  She was not happy because I had asked Mom to ask her not to bring her kids to the hospital on Monday night since I knew that it would be a long and tiring day for me. They didn’t stay too long.

My visiting teacher, Leigh Laursen, and neighbor, Kelley Green, came to visit Alicia and me at the hospital on Thursday.  Kelley had a baby in April and Leigh is due in September.  It was so thoughtful of them to make the effort to come.

I slept completely through the night on Tuesday night, and that’s the last time that has happened for a long time, but my other nights at the hospital were full of interruptions and waking up for pain meds.  My percadan was changed to another med on Wednesday, but it did very little for the pain and kept me awake for a lot of the night.  I was fortunate to have great nurses during my stay.

Alicia and I had to leave the hospital before 8 am on Friday morning (insurance covers 96 hours for a c-section from the moment of birth).  Since I was leaving before breakfast, the nurse brought me some yogurt, juice and toast.  Chris was coming to pick us up by 7:45, so I spent the morning packing our stuff and then dressing Alicia for her trip home.  She looked so cute and pretty in her little pink outfit.  We were both checked out by the nurse one last time and just as we were getting ready to leave, Alicia filled her diaper.  That delayed us for a couple of minutes but we were quickly on our way after that.   The nurse’s assistant wheeled my down in a wheel chair and had to make sure that we had a car seat for Alicia to travel home in.

It is always a weird feeling bringing a baby home for the first time–a little person who is now a part of our family.  We arrived, and went next door to Kelley Green’s to pick up Amy.  She was rather happy to see us, but that was just the beginning of her adjustment to life with a sister.  Amy took about a week to settle down when going to sleep, and I finally realized that she was afraid that I wouldn’t be here when she woke up.  We have pictures of her standing on the counter in the bathroom so that I could hold her on my shoulder with a very sad “I missed you so much” look on her face.  Chris carried Amy over to the bed and I carefully sat on it to hold her longer.  She just didn’t want to let her mommy go.  We made sure to show her my incision so that she would know I had an owie and to try and keep her from hurting me, but she mostly forgot when she tried to climb on my lap.  When I went to the bathroom, though, she would always come in to look at it.

Chris went up to Salt Lake to help Brad and Dallin install computers in their new practice on Saturday leaving me with both of the girls.  Alicia wasn’t much of a problem since I could lift her and she was sleeping for much of the time, but Amy wasn’t used to me not being able to hold her.  I had to call Susan to come and put Amy in bed for her morning nap, but that was hardly acceptable.  I let Amy cry for a little while and then got a chair for her to climb out of her bed with and then climb on to my bed with a stool.  We laid down on the bed together and slept beside each other.  She was much happier doing that.

We had kind, wonderful people bring in meals from Friday until the next Wednesday.  Rowes on Friday, Slaters on Saturday as well as Bergers–friends from Novell–Glenns on Sunday, Ewells on Monday, Grants on Tuesday, and Greens on Wednesday.  Kevin and Candace also brought a meal over on Friday and Kings invited us for dinner on Sunday.

Chris’ family arrived in Utah on the 23rd of July and stayed for the next three weeks.  For the first two weeks they stayed at Kevin and Candace’s home and then Chris’ Mom stayed with us for the last week.  They were anxious and excited to see their granddaughters.  They took Amy to the zoo in Salt Lake during the first week and she seemed to enjoy the animals.

Alicia had her two week doctors checkup today Wednesday, July 25  She is growing and gaining weight but still seems so tiny.  She weighed 8 pounds 6 ounces, which is only 3 ounces bigger than Amy was when she was born.  Alicia has grown from 19 inches to 20 3/4 though.

Sunday, July 29, 2001

Alicia had her first shower with Daddy.  Her bellybutton fell off on Friday the 25th so she was now able to have baths and showers.  She seemed to enjoy it quite a lot.  She didn’t cry at all and just lay against Chris’ chest and let the water rush over her.

Friday, 27 July, 2001

It seems to take me awhile to find the time to catch up on a birth experience.  I imagine that it will come a little at a time until I am able to record all of the events of our new daughter’s birth.  I received a phone call from labor and delivery at Utah Valley Regional Medical Center on Sunday evening the 8th instructing me to be at the hospital at 5:30 am the next morning.  We had originally planned on 6 am, so I called my mom to ask her if she could be at our house even earlier.

My parents just happened to be in Utah helping my brothers prepare their optometry practice for opening.  They had arrived on July 2nd and, at that time, I hadn’t planned on having the c-section the following Monday.  When I did make the decision to go ahead with the scheduled birth, it was a nice convenience that Mom could be here to help us out.

Mom arrived at 5:20 am as I was walking down the stairs carrying my hospital bag.  She was still in her pajamas and Amy was still fast asleep.  I felt badly leaving Amy without her knowing what was going on, but I knew she wouldn’t understand.  I was just grateful that she could be with someone who would take good care of her.

Chris and I arrived at the hospital–a 5 minute drive from our house–and checked me in.  I had preregistered previously, and since I had already had a baby at this hospital, much of the admission procedures that I went through last time were omitted.  We were taken to room 516, one room away from where I was last time.  I was given a lovely hospital gown to change into and then we were left alone in the room for awhile.  We turned on the news and Chris pulled out the video camera as well as his digital camera.  We were much better prepared this time to record the events of this birth.  A nurse–Linda, who was also my nurse at Amy’s birth–came in to hook me up to the heartbeat monitor and start an IV.  That is not my favorite experience, but then the experiences involving pain just get better as the day goes on.

The epidural man, Dr. Govindjay (I am not sure if that spelling is correct.  I looked at his name tag a couple of times, but my memory is somewhat foggy.  He is from India and was great.) came in about 6:30 am and let me tell you how much fun that was!  It is a rather painful procedure to have the epidural inserted, and you have to hold completely still the entire time.  But obviously you wouldn’t want to have a c-section without being numb and the epidural numbs you from the chest right down to your toes.

We called my mom around 7 am just to see if Amy was awake yet and to make sure that everything was okay.  Amy had been awake since before 6:30 unfortunately and Mom was just trying to get her to eat.  I talked to Amy for a minute, but as usual, she didn’t say much in response.  I think she was just happy to hear her mommy’s voice.

I was wheeled into the Operating Room around 7:15 and the first thing I remember was how cold it was.  I was already shaking and cold from the epidural.  Linda and Dr. Govindjay transferred me to the operating table with some kind of contraption.  From here, the procedure was pretty much the same as last time. My stomach was sterilized, a towel was wrapped around my ankles to keep them together, a sheet was draped in front of my face, and a wonderfully warm blanket was placed across my chest and arms.  My doctor, Dr. Berry, and the surgeon, Dr. Sellers, arrived at 7:30 and began to scrub for the surgery.  Chris was dressed in a white jumpsuit with a cap on his head, booties on his feet, and a mask on his face.  (I got a picture of him this time).  He was set to go with the video camera around his neck and the digital camera in hand.

Chris again watched the surgery and even caught a lot of it on tape this time.  (We watched it about a week ago and there were only a few parts I wasn’t able to watch.)  Unfortunately, he recorded a lot of the floor as well, not realizing that he was leaving it on every time he stopped recording.

I remember feeling them cutting through the scar tissue–not that it was painful but they had to tug on it a lot.  It wasn’t a great feeling.  Once they finally cut through the womb, amniotic fluid gushed all over the place, but fortunately there was little meconium in the fluid.  From there, it took a lot of time and effort for them to get the baby out.  She was quite engaged in the birth canal and they pushed and tugged and pulled on my stomach.  Again, I couldn’t feel the pain that was surely accompanying all of this struggle because of the epidural, but I could certainly feel all of the pressure.  Finally they had to resort to forceps to pull out our little girl.  The first thing I heard was her coughing but I don’t remember hearing her cry.  Dr. Berry held her up for me to see and said, “She’s beautiful.”  I remember thinking, “Hmmm.”  She didn’t look so great all covered in blood and white cheesy looking stuff.  Her face was puffy and frankly she wasn’t looking all that pretty at that moment.

The nurse quickly whisked the baby away and Chris followed after her.  From here until they finish stitching me, I don’t remember much except for Dr. Govindjay saying, “Just relax”.  He must have given me something to knock me out because I have seen pictures of this time, and I have no recollection of having an oxygen mask placed over my nose or hearing any conversation.

The next thing I do remember is that I am back in a hospital bed ready to be wheeled out of the OR.  Dr. Berry is there and says that everything went wonderfully.  I asked to see the placenta.  I remember thinking that it looked like a huge blood clot or liver.  Not too attractive but a lot bigger than I thought.

I have not yet mentioned what we named our little girl because it took us until the next day to decide on what to name her.  When Dr. Berry asked us what her name was, Chris said that we weren’t quite sure yet.  Dr. Berry replied that the two most popular baby names were, “I don’t know” and “We’re not sure”.  Our little girl was perfectly healthy with Apgars of 8 and 9 (same as Amy’s incidentally) weighing in at 7 pounds 10 ounces and 19 inches in length.  (Amy was the same length but about a half pound heavier when she was born). 

I was wheeled back to recovery and stayed there for some time.  My memory is quite foggy around this time, so I can’t really tell you how long it was.  After awhile, however, I was transported to the maternity floor one floor down and deposited into room 421.  I had not held or even seen my baby since that brief moment in the OR, and I was getting anxious.  She had a low body temperature and they wanted to get her a little warmer before they brought her to me.  I think it was finally about 10:30 am when they brought this tiny little bundle into my room.  My legs were still somewhat numb though I could move the right one.  The left leg was completely numb and I couldn’t budge it a bit.  I had to actually have someone pick it up and move it for me.  I still had the catheter and IV in my right arm, but amid all of this, my sweet little girl was placed in my arms.

She had about as much dark brown hair as Amy did when she was born though it wasn’t quite as curly and such a tiny little head.  Her face was a bit swollen from being so far into the birth canal and both her eyelids and forehead were red–they call those markings “stork bites” and sometimes they take up to a year to fade.  She also had a lot of little white pimple-like bumps on her nose and forehead, but those faded throughout the day.  She had a sweet tiny little face with cute rosebud lips and a skinny little body.  I remember Amy being much more chunky.  She had long fingers and toes with fingernails that needed to be cut right away.  I just remember thinking how tiny she was.

Shortly after, Chris was anxious to have Amy come and meet her sister.  So while, I nursed the baby, he went home to pick up Mom and Amy.  When they returned, Chris had Amy wait in the hallway for a moment so that he could capture the meeting on camera.  Amy walked into the room and up to my bed taking everything and then held out her arms to hold the baby.  It was so sweet.  Chris lifted Amy up onto the bed and together they held the baby for quite some time.  Amy was quick to point out nose, eyes, ears, etc. but we still have to caution her to be soft.

Grandma Rice was the first family member to be introduced to our new daughter.  She has never been close for the birth of any of her grandchildren, so this was a special moment for her.

While they were visiting, I decided that I needed to get out of bed and stretch.  So, with IV and catheter in tow, I slowly made my way off of the bed.  Ohhhh, I remembered that pain, but I also knew that lying in bed wasn’t doing me as much good.  I made my way into the bathroom to clean off and change pads because I was still bleeding quite a bit (that’s normal), and then I think I went for a short walk around the unit.  My memory of this time is rather fuzzy.  They brought me some lunch, if you can call it that since it was all liquids, later in the afternoon, and Chris took Amy and Mom home so that Amy could have her nap.  They came back later in the afternoon and that began the pattern of coming and going around Amy’s naps for the next couple of days.

Saturday, 7 July, 2001

It is almost 4 am and I can’t sleep.  After going back and forth between choosing a vaginal birth or a repeat c-section, I have finally decided on the c-section.  Not because this is a life-threatening situation, but because the likelihood of having a repeat of Amy’s birth is great.  I went to see Dr. Berry last Thursday for a regularly scheduled OB appointment, hoping to be even the tiniest bit dilated.  Not so.  My cervix is as tight and closed up as they come.  At that point, I had already signed the release papers for a VBAC (Vaginal Birth after Cesarean), but realized that this pregnancy had a lot of the signs of Amy’s.  On my way home, I felt as though I needed to elect for a c-section because that is how my body was best able to give birth.  I know that it may not make sense to you, but after weeks of going back and forth between the two delivery types and not feeling too impressed to choose one or the other, I finally felt as though a decision had been made correctly.  To me, it is simply most important that my children arrive safely in this world and recovering from surgery is a small price to pay.

So, our newest little girl will arrive on Monday, July 9th at approximately 7:45 am.  The surgery is scheduled for 7:30 am and Chris and I will need to be at the hospital at 6 am.

Monday, 24 June, 2001

If our new baby were to come on her due date, there are only three weeks left!  Yeah!  I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore.  Most of my body aches, especially when I wake up in the morning.  There is only one position that is really comfortable for me and that is sleeping on my left side.  I think the baby dropped last week, because I feel a lot more pressure down low.

Right now we are contemplating naming our new daughter Alicia Michelle.  Alicia means “honest and noble” and Michelle means “who is like God”.  I think that the meaning of the name is just as important as the actual name and how it flows together.  Amy’s name means “beloved” and Christine means “Christ-bearer”.  We haven’t told anyone her name yet because we like to save at least one surprise until the end.

I have gone through all of Amy’s baby clothes as well as some that I have borrowed from Susan and washed everything.  There were stains on a few things but most everything came clean.  As far as being ready for this baby, I think that we are.  And today would be nice for her arrival.  I will probably continue saying that until she does arrives.  In talking with my doctor about how to deliver this baby, he would recommend a c-section.  Some days that doesn’t sound like such a bad idea, especially since I could have the baby one week early, but I really want to try a vaginal birth.  It still may not work for me, but I am mostly hopeful that the recovery time will be far less than with a c-section.

Chris got home from Colorado last Friday night.  It was nice to have him back.  I must say that the week without him truly wore me out–between taking care of Amy and making sure that the house was spotless and ready to show at any time.  We did have a few people come and look at the house last week, but no bites as of yet.

Chris looked for places to rent since our new house in Firestone has not been started yet.  We will probably have to rent for at least three or four months, which truly does not excite me.  There are a few leads that we can follow up on, but we also have a relocation lady in Denver who is helping us.

Thursday, 21 June, 2001

Chris is in Colorado again this week.  The time seems to be going a bit faster than the last time he was away.  He will come home on Friday evening.  He worked from home for the previous three weeks mostly on training.  It was a little overwhelming at first, especially since he didn’t have the ability to simply walk down the hall and ask another coworker questions, and he didn’t have all the access that he needed.  I think that he is beginning to feel a lot more comfortable with what he already knows and more focused on what he has yet to learn.  It was more of a struggle for Amy to have her Daddy around all of the time but not available.  She must have figured that since he was here he could come and play any time.  We finally had to get a gate to put in front of the bedroom door so that she couldn’t just walk in whenever.

Chris bought another desk with some graduation money and so we have a desk in the study as well as in our bedroom.  It is nice because I still have a place to work and the bedroom is still plenty big and not crowded at all.

There is now less than a month until my due date.  The dilemma that I am facing right now is to decide whether to have a scheduled c-section or try to deliver this baby naturally.  There are pros and cons to either.  Dr. Berry would recommend that I go for the c-section, but I want so much to avoid the long recovery of surgery.  I have about one week before I have to decide for certain.

I have tried to continue exercising throughout this pregnancy.  Somedays, like today, it is harder than others.  Amy and I go together usually around 8:30 in the morning when it is still cool enough for me to be outside.  Today I had a lot of pains in my side and couldn’t walk very fast.  I don’t think they were contractions–just bothersome pains.

Our house has now been listed with Coldwell Banker.  It is a bit of a challenge to keep it clean all of the time, but anyone that has come to look at it so far says that it shows like new.

Amy seems to be well into the swing of terrible twos.  She has little tantrums on the floor, likes to scream loudly when she gets really frustrated, and is more than happy to run away from us when we take her outside (followed by much wailing and gnashing of her 12 teeth).  She finally got her fourth molar a couple of weeks ago–that along with a cold.  Fortunately, neither Chris nor I got sick, and we have all been healthy since.

Amy has been going to nursery now for three weeks.  She seems to enjoy it quite a bit.  The first week, Chris stayed in the room with her for about an hour and then snuck out–she was fine.  The next week, I stayed for only a couple of minutes, and when she was playing and involved and forgetting that I was there, I slipped out.  She does get sad and cries when other parents come to pick up their kids and she is the last one left, but what a treat it has been for us to have her in nursery.  I can actually enjoy being at church now.

I was asked to speak in church last Sunday–Father’s Day–but the lady who spoke first took so much time that all I had time for was to bear my testimony.  There was still another speaker after me as well as comments from the Bishop.  I figured that the lady needed to speak and air some of her feelings more than I did.  People told me afterward that they enjoyed my testimony, but I think they were just glad that I kept things short and sweet.  Another lady hoped that the bishop would give me another opportunity (bless her heart!).  I told her we would be leaving soon, so it was doubtful.